Right Way to live

Right Way to live, a life's journey!!!

Few things are always memorable in life, like the first step a child takes, first time she goes to school, first time she says mom and first time you take her

out to dine and very sophisticatedly she sits like a fine lady and finishes her food. You start wondering if at all she had been taught to behave like that. Then you think if she is born with the feminine and graceful qualities.

2 to 3 years old boy may be sipping his cold drink with loud bubbling noise sitting far from the table and lot of straws being attached to one another to reach his drink. Tell him not to do it and he hardly acknowledges what you are saying.

This difference makes girls so dear to their parents. She does not promise to stay with her family forever, nor she can assure to be there whenever her family needs her, still a father's heart beats faster for his daughter, may not equally fast for his wife or his son.


What is so special about her? While going out for a movie with her friends she takes permission from her parents, asks for pocket money and promises to be at home on time. But a boy goes to his college, remembers that today is his bunk day, visits the nearby movie hall and watches any random movie just to pass his time. His mom calls asking about his whereabouts and then he informs that he is in the movie hall watching movie with friends and argues with his mother for disturbing him and cuts the phone. This isn't mean that he does not love his parents but his style of expressing his love is somewhat different.

Ask a girl if she wants to leave her parents and go to other house after marriage then her answer would be a big "NO". Ask a guy same question and his answer would also be a "no" however he further adds, "But it depends on the situation and circumstances, things want me to be away then I will have to."

Irony is that, it is the girl who has to leave her parents / her house and stay forever in someone else house, but a guy lives in his own house for his whole life. He sleeps on the same regular bed where he is most comfortable sleeping, sits on his regular couch, watches his favorite programs on TV and eats what he is born eating. However everything changes for a girl. She accepts the house given to her, she sleeps on a different bed than at her parents' home. She eats according to the taste of her in-laws house and does not fight for the TV remote. This is how she learns to adjust and grows faster than her brother (this answers the common question asked in every other movie, why girls grow faster than boys).

After a while, everything gets into the habit and she starts liking the new things given to her. She misses her mom's Dal Makhani but her mom in-law's Veg Pulao is just amazing to have.

Slowly and steadily things get back to normal and she adopts the "right way to live" and follow the customs which she is born to follow. Just like in office, your old company knows your worth but when you shift job you have to start from the beginning and prove your worth again. It is like, you are just being born and telling the world who you are.

I was bought up, watching my parents around and larking with my brother. We have a joint family and every time I used to be around someone or the other. I never experienced sitting alone, nor I stayed without them ever before I got married.

One fine day, I woke up, I didn't find anyone around. I was not able to hear my niece's chirping voice. Missed my brother sleeping besides me with his open mouth. Missed my mom's wake up call, missed arguing with my papa in the morning for first turn to use dressing table.

Before getting married I used to rush home, through my bag in any corner, take up the chips or scan the fridge and sit idly in front of TV for hours. Now I have to think and plan to go to my home (parent's house) and when I go there, I cannot sit idly. I have to help my mom in the kitchen, sit like a lady and not a teenager and serve food to everyone before munching my chips. My brother laughed at many instances on me as I am showing too much of maturity which was least expected from me, being the youngest daughter in the family. Bow to everyone and touch everyone's feet and greet them, before marriage only a "Namaste" or a "Hi" would do.

I wonder sometimes when I visit my parents home, am I the same girl who used to live here and had the authority on every single thing. Now I have to be decent enough not to fight for TV remote or chocolate with my brother. Because he gives it all himself and does not leave any scope for a fight or snatching!!! Not fair!!! After marriage my importance increased :) or it was there earlier but no one showed.

"Parents cry when their daughter is leaving their home after marriage. That means they are sad then why do they have to do it?" I asked the same question when my father cried on my wedding. He replied, "We are not sad that you are going, we want you to stay happy and we may not be there physically to see your smiling face, that's why we are crying."

I also questioned, "I wont be able to share my happiness, sadness, grief's and mood swings with my best friend, my mom, for what I am making these sacrifices and suffering these discomforts?"

He again consoled me and said, "You are getting your new pal for rest of your life, who is of same age as yours. He will understand you better. He will prove a better friend because he will be there with you no matter what. Your mom also has to take care of her husband, son and rest of the family but his sole and first responsibility is you. That's why we call them soul mates and he will prove a better friend than anyone in this world."

My mom said, "During my wedding day if I would have got stubborn like you and spoken like you then you would not have seen the world and I would not have got a dear daughter like you. In that case, I would have been in loss and not you. So dear, do you want to face that loss yourself?"

The question stuck me, I stopped giving further thoughts on the same and got carried away with what life was offering me. Enjoyed every bit of it however at the back of my mind I always knew that living away from my parents would not be that easy. But such is life. Sometimes we get difficult question paper in exam, it does not mean that we would not attempt the paper. We have to clear this exam of life with flying colors.

Now people tell me, "choti si ladki ki shadi bhi ho gai". This phrase always reminds me of my life before marriage, my childhood, my cousins and all the festivals I celebrated with them. When we all teen girls of the colony used to make a gang and visit people's house for 'Kanjake'. I remember how a night before, me and my cousin used to make plans and small little girls used to wake early for the festival celebration, getting ready wearing beautiful outfits. Those bangles and bindi used to look adorable on tiny hands and forehead. Now the arms have grown and size of bangles has also grown. Where has the time gone and before I can think to blink, I was married to the guy of my dreams.

Amazing time that was but more amazing time still awaits for every girl in the world!!!